07.12.2021

How to effectively resist psychological pressure. Psychological pressure and how to resist it How to respond to pressure from superiors


In the Labor Code forced dismissal is not subject to special provisions, and the employer can use many tricks to force a person quit . How to protect your interests?

Under what circumstances can you be forced to leave?

People often do not know their rights well or are simply afraid to go against the system. But if, in such a situation, dismissed will not be at a loss and will collect enough evidence that an illegal and forced dismissal will be able to keep the position or receive monetary compensation.

The reasons why an employer forces an employee to write an application for voluntary dismissal , most often lie in the desire of management to save money or time. force employee to be fired can in the following situations:

  1. Downsizing state or liquidation of the enterprise.
  2. The employee is allowed systematic or serious violations of the labor schedule.
  3. The qualifications of the employee do not correspond to the position he occupies.
  4. Personal dislike or desire to attach "your" person to the position.

By law, compulsion to dismiss at will on the part of the employer is unacceptable, the definition itself initially assumes only the desire of the dismissed person to terminate contract.

How to recognize coercion to quit?

If a person is satisfied with his position and salary, then any attempts to force him to refuse this position fit the definition of " forced dismissal ". An employer can exert pressure in the following ways:

  1. Report that the quality of work is not satisfactory, and offer to quit on your own.
  2. Threaten to fire under the article if the employee does not agree to do it himself, or threaten with physical harm.
  3. Find fault and fine for the slightest offense, deprive bonuses and so on.
  4. Openly violate the rights of an employee: reduce his salary, demand overtime work, and the like.
  5. Issue documents retroactively or forge the signature of an objectionable employee.

According to article 81 of the Labor Code of the Russian Federation, in order to dismiss an employee against his will, you need not only good reasons, but also compliance with the procedure for terminating the contract. The employee must be notified in writing of the decision made within 2 to 6 months, depending on the reason.

In addition, in some cases compensation payments are made. Here are unscrupulous leaders and forced to quit under article 77 of the Labor Code, which contains general grounds for dismissal.

How to legally protect yourself from the pressure of management?

Anyone can face the situation forced layoffs . In such cases, you should be prepared for the following actions:

  1. Inform management of your knowledge of labor law and the illegality of what is happening.
  2. Accurately follow the working order, instructions to request in writing so that the management does not have a reason for nit-picking.
  3. If the employer creates provocative situations in order to compromise the employee, make sure that there are witnesses who can speak in court.
  4. If there is such an opportunity, it makes sense to think about transferring to another division of the company.
  5. If the current work is not too important, forced dismissal by agreement of the parties You can turn it to your advantage by insisting on monetary compensation.
  6. Draw up a statement of claim in court, providing evidence of violations by the employer.

Knowing your rights, you can solve a similar problem on your own or seek help from a lawyer.

Nuance! Having discovered the knowledge of the intricacies of the law and the determination of the employee, the management usually prefers to resolve the issue in a peaceful way that suits both parties.

Where to apply, and what evidence of coercion do you need to have?

It is quite difficult to achieve justice in case of illegal dismissal. But, knowing what evidence will be accepted by the court, you can defend your rights. When applying to the labor inspectorate or the prosecutor's office before signing the letter of resignation, the relevant services will conduct an audit and issue a warning to the employer about the unlawfulness of his actions. If the application has already been signed, but the person does not want to leave, there are three solutions:

  • write a complaint to the labor inspectorate;
  • apply to the prosecutor's office;
  • file a lawsuit in court.

The deadlines for contacting the authorities are limited to a month after the termination of the contract.

Sample application to the labor inspectorate.

The labor inspectorate or the prosecutor's office will check the data and, if the alleged violations are found, they will take the case to court. In order to prove in court the fact of forced resignation from work, the following evidence is needed:

  1. Written evidence or audio recordings of disputes, disagreements and threats from the administration of the enterprise.
  2. Copies of orders indicating coercion to quit: deprivation of bonuses, fines, demotion, and so on.
  3. Testimony of people who saw and heard threats and demands to vacate their positions.

If immediately after the termination of the employment contract, another person is hired for the vacant position, this may serve as evidence of the employer's prior knowledge of the vacant vacancy.

Attention! The difficult financial situation and other adverse conditions resulting from the loss of a job can also indirectly confirm what happened compulsion to quit.

How does pressure on an employee threaten an employer from a legal point of view?

Of course, for forcing an employee management is not threatened with a prison term for dismissal, but still they will have to answer for violations of rights. Depending on the severity of violations, the following types of penalties are applied:

  1. Disciplinary penalties under labor law.
  2. In accordance with administrative law - the imposition of a fine and material compensation to the victim, followed by reinstatement (Article 5.27 of the Code of Administrative Offenses of the Russian Federation).
  3. When forced to dismiss a pregnant employee, management will incur criminal liability from forced labor to the suspension of business activities (Article 145 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation).

In case of detection of forgery in documents or damage to health from psychological or physical pressure, a criminal case may also be initiated against the perpetrators.

Psychological pressure is such a way of influencing a person, in which it is possible to influence not only his actions and mode of action, but often even his way of thinking and opinion.

Psychological pressure is resorted to for various reasons. Often this is done because of a lack of real power in the person exerting pressure, or because of self-doubt. A person who possesses does not put pressure on others, but solves problems, trying to use direct and honest methods.

Psychological pressure not only "breaks" the victim and gives her a lot of anxiety and loss of an inner sense of security. This method of influence can also turn against the one who uses it - the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation provides for an article (Article 40 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation) for those who exert insurmountable psychological pressure. The article provides for punishment for psychological pressure on a person, and at the same time is an acquittal for the victim of such influence - the justice of the Russian Federation considers pressure so powerful that it can drive a person to a crime against his will.

Thus, pressure in psychology is an extremely undesirable mode of action. It may seem that knowing how to put pressure on a person psychologically is great and effective, and it helps a lot in life to achieve your own goals. Many psychologists, especially those who specialize in business training, also think so. However, pressure remains an unhealthy strategy that can only bring temporary results, and in the long run only brings injury and suffering to those around you.

Knowing how to suppress a person psychologically is necessary first of all in order to be able to resist this pressure from others. Many people are familiar with this condition, in which, after being manipulated, they are forced to do something that is contrary to their inner beliefs. At the same time, they experience a lot of mixed negative emotions - from shame and anger to a literal split of the personality into two parts.

Types of psychological pressure

There are several types of psychological pressure, each of which requires special attention to its management and avoidance strategy. Here are the most common types of pressure, and then we'll talk about how to resist them.

The first of them, the most unpretentious and undisguised, is coercion. Coercion can, which has an imaginary or real superiority over its victim. It could be a boss threatening to fire you, or a gangster from a doorway threatening with a knife. Both of these are nothing but coercion.

Humiliation (or humiliation) is the second type of psychological pressure. For him, the manipulator gets personal, offends (probably even publicly), emphasizes the flaws that are painful for the victim: appearance, illness, marital status, etc. The lowest and most offensive words are selected that are designed to “crush” the victim of manipulation. How does it work for a manipulator, what does a humiliated person want to do for a person who has told him so much? It's very simple: after the sounded nasty things, the manipulator immediately offers a way by which the humiliated victim can rise in the eyes of society - to fulfill the proposed assignment.

The next method of pressure is avoidance. In this case, implicit manipulation is performed, and when the victim tries to clarify the situation, the manipulator waves it off indignantly. Thus, the victim of manipulation creates "cognitive dissonance" - an unpleasant feeling that she is doing something wrong. In an effort to get rid of this feeling, a person fulfills any requests of the manipulator.

Suggestion and persuasion are options for applying psychological pressure. At the same time, the manipulator must have some kind of influence on the victim: either have absolute authority in her eyes, or be a well-known person to her. Suggestion is more focused on emotions. The manipulator may use phrases like "Listen to me, I know for sure ...", or "Don't you trust my opinion ...", or "I only wish you well, therefore ...".

In this case, the psychological suppression of a person occurs, as it were, out of good intentions, as a result of which the victim adopts the imposed opinion and begins to consider it his own. Persuasion is characterized by rationalization, i.e., they try to inspire a person with something, using the arguments of logic, sometimes quite perverted. The number of arguments, both real and imaginary, reaches such a quantity that the victim's brain simply gets tired of perceiving the information critically and automatically agrees.

Gratitude required. This is a variant of long-term psychological pressure. The manipulator first renders the victim a service: one that was not asked for and that did not really cost him anything. He can regularly provide such imaginary "help" to the victim, rubbing himself into confidence. At the moment when the manipulator has something, the request “return the favor” comes into play. The request can become quite intrusive and turn into threats if the victim does not agree to the terms right away.

How to resist psychological pressure?

It should be understood that manipulators are not guided by a special list where it is written how to put pressure on a person psychologically. This means that the manipulator does not choose only one method of pressure - in life there may be the most sophisticated combinations of strategies that change in the course of exposure to the victim. These methods are chosen depending on the intuition and the degree of depravity of the manipulator, i.e., practically nothing limits his imagination.

In this regard, coping strategies must also be flexible. To know how to resist psychological pressure, you need to realize that it is being applied to you. Sometimes it is very difficult to do this: as already mentioned, there are a lot of ways to exert psychological pressure on a person and they can form the most unexpected combinations. Therefore, it is necessary to regularly ask yourself the question: am I doing this because I want to, or does someone else want it? If, when answering a question, you feel some fragmentation, splitting, if your motivation is dictated from the outside by a specific person, this is a sign that you are under pressure.

Psychological pressure can be defeated by resorting to a straightforward rebuff. However, this does not work for all manipulators, and not every victim can maintain a “fighting spirit”. A direct response implies that the victim, having realized his position, informs the manipulator that his demands are unrealistic or undesirable. For some manipulators, directness can be confusing and they admit defeat, but in many cases, the victim can be immediately entangled in a network of less obvious manipulations, accept the guilt imposed on her, and wallow in other people's ambitions even deeper.

Work on yourself and your self-esteem. It is no secret that it is easier to exert psychological pressure on a person if he is not confident in himself and his own abilities. It is almost impossible to reach a higher level of your life on your own, especially for a person who is already under pressure, therefore, in such situations, the intervention of a specialist is necessary.

The psychologist conducts trainings and practical classes on personal growth, and also helps people who have fallen under the influence of manipulators to realize their own goals and learn how to avoid pressure from outside. Especially the help of a specialist is required if the toxic environment covers the victim's immediate circle of friends - family or loved ones. A psychologist will teach you how to resist the psychological pressure of a husband or parents without destroying family ties.

Psychological pressure: protection against manipulation in several tricks

Psychological pressure is harder to recognize than overcome. If you know exactly who is exerting pressure on you and in what matters, a few simple defense techniques will help you. They may seem insignificant, but if you are aware of what and why you are using them, then they will work. Receptions against psychological pressure are as follows:

  • Create barriers. If you feel that an unpleasant conversation is starting, in which they will try to “crush” you, put various objects between you and the interlocutor. An ashtray, a chair, a cup, a mobile phone - any, even an insignificant, object on the way from the manipulator to you can become your mental "protection" and an obstacle to aggressive influence.
  • Take closed postures. Cross your legs, cross your arms, put your finger on your lips or eyebrows, prop your face with your palm. All these natural barriers that you create with your own body in the way of aggressive influence will help you think more critically in relation to what the interlocutor imputes to you. In addition, these poses give confidence.
  • Create mental barriers. Outline with your imagination a circle around you, stand up a dome or a wall, you can mentally place yourself in a spacesuit. Imagine that behind an imaginary barrier is your security zone, where no one can penetrate, no matter how hard they try.
  • Distract the attention of the manipulator. Move objects in front of him, perform various manipulations, cough, yawn, stretch: show any physical activity that will prevent the opponent from concentrating on what he is saying. The main thing is not to overdo it, because everything should look natural.
  • Present the interlocutor in a funny way. For example, mentally put a jester's hat on your important boss or make him a screaming penguin. As long as you are focused on creating a funny image, you will not have time to be afraid, which means you will have more opportunities to think about the incoming information and confront it.

These techniques will help you gain confidence and find a mental resource in order to resist the manipulator. can be used constantly, but they are not enough to constructively discuss a controversial subject and unconditionally regain an advantage in a situation.

How to get out of pressure?

Here are specific techniques that will allow you to lure the advantage to your side in a conflict situation:

  1. Ask questions. The first question to ask when applying pressure is "Can I refuse this request?" Even if the opponent answers "Yes, but ...", you can already operate on this answer to explain your refusal. If the answer is no, a number of other questions should be asked. It is especially important during such an "interview" to monitor the reaction of the manipulator - his facial expressions or gestures. Often only a close look is enough to break the opponent's confidence. Clarifying questions that are not a direct confrontation, but help to identify “holes” in manipulation, can help in a situation of pressure. “Does it look like I don’t want to take responsibility?”, “Does it show that I’m afraid?”, “What should I be afraid of?”, “Do you think that I have no right to refuse?”, “Why are you so sure of what you're saying?" Such questions can confuse the manipulator and buy time for the next step.
  2. Determine your opponent's strategy. How are they trying to break you? Maybe the manipulator refers to his experience or age? Take advantage of your experience and age. Referring to authorities? Question them or say that this figure is not authoritative in your specific dispute. Trying to put pressure on others? If they are present during the conversation in person, you can ask each of them why they support your opponent and not you. If the manipulator is trying to gain an advantage with a pace or a quick attack, take a break - say that you need to urgently move away. The main thing in any dispute is to take your time and be attentive to exactly how pressure is applied in order to find the weaknesses of this method.
  3. Use your benefits. It is best to use the same strategies as your opponent - to find the support of third parties or authorities, your own merit or experience. However, do not overdo it: your task is to extinguish the conflict by balancing forces, and not provoke a new one by transferring the manipulator to the status of a victim.
  4. Negotiate. Now that the manipulator's strategy has been reversed and he cannot unconditionally dictate his terms to you, you have an option that suits both of you equally. Offer compromise solutions. If it is possible to forever avoid contact with the manipulator, it is worth cutting off all the ends and no longer dealing with this person.

Remember that psychological pressure is a traumatic method of influence, and it is better not to resort to it unnecessarily. And if you can't handle the pressure on your own, don't be afraid to ask for help.

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Have you ever quarreled with your loved one? Have you ever had to do something after such a quarrel that you later regretted? Do you know the situation when you thought about some idea for a long time, in order to then voice it, for example, to your boss at work, but after a conversation with him, you left the office squeezed like a lemon, and even with the need to lead a completely different project? Have you ever had to make unnecessary promises or make ridiculous commitments while communicating with someone?

If you answered yes to at least one of the proposed questions, then you have experienced from your own experience that this is psychological pressure. Unfortunately, communication with people around us, including even those closest to us, is not always free from manipulation and attempts to influence us. Knowing how to resist psychological pressure is not at all a whim and not pumping your skills, but a real life necessity.

Types of psychological pressure

Before we talk about what are the ways to protect against psychological attacks, it makes sense to briefly recall the most common forms of such attacks. Let's present them in ascending order of negative potential.

Rhetorical questions

One of the most common forms of psychological pressure is asking rhetorical questions. For example, you may be asked: “Well, why are you so worthless?”, “Do you even understand what you are doing?” or "Do you understand what you just did?" etc. Trying to answer such questions does not make much sense, as well as ignoring them, because by doing so you either admit that you are wrong (it is quite likely that this is not the case at all), or show disrespect to the interlocutor.

To fend off such a psychological attack, you can continue the question and give some kind of positive answer, for example: “Yes, I understand what I did, and I did it because ...” Thus, in a number of situations, you can solve the problem, even with the help of a lively , but quite a constructive argument. Despite this, if you do not know how to resist psychological pressure, most likely, you will only aggravate the situation.

Guilt

In any communicative situation, it is important to understand that everyone has their own truth, and the line between truth and lies can be fuzzy. The same events are often perceived differently by different people. And on this "trick" many manipulators build their psychological attacks, putting pressure on the interlocutor. This is a very clever technique, and with people who do not have psychological defense techniques, it works flawlessly.

To counter this technique, it is helpful to start by playing along with the manipulator so that its pressure does not increase. Further, you should not take on any unnecessary obligations or promise something that you are not going to keep. There is also a more radical method - just answer the person with a refusal. Although these methods do not always work. Manipulators know this, and using guilt is one of the most powerful techniques in their arsenal.

Massive attack

This technique is typical for people who put psychological pressure on a person who has all the powers not to do what they want from him. Often found in business and at work. The technique consists in the fact that the addressee of the manipulation begins to be attacked from all sides by various methods by people interested in resolving the situation in their favor.

For example, if a representative of the “weak” side does not want to sign a contract during the negotiations, the “strong” side begins to put pressure on him. This can be expressed in endless calls, constant visits of representatives to the office of the victim of attacks, huge amounts of emails, etc. The bottom line is that a person cannot withstand such psychological pressure and simply gives up under the onslaught of an opponent.

And here are a few more methods of psychological pressure of this kind:

  • a massive attack on the client is carried out;
  • in organizations, a massive attack is made on managers (for example, to increase salaries) or ordinary employees (for example, to dismiss);
  • in the activities of collection agencies, a massive attack on debtors is carried out, etc.

A skillful psychological attack can unsettle even a persistent and strong person, not to mention those who are not ready for such aggression against themselves. There are two best ways to protect yourself from it:

  • the victim talks separately with each member of the "campaign" against himself and explains his position;
  • the victim enters into negotiations with the main opponent and resolves all issues with him.

The adoption of such measures is quite effective, but still does not give an absolute guarantee of victory over the manipulator.

direct threat

This method of psychological pressure is not distinguished by the need for a special intelligence in the aggressor, but is very effective. When someone openly threatens the interests of a person, especially what is very important and valuable for him, it is extremely difficult for him to refuse. But even here there is one BUT: far from always a threatening person is able to realize his threats. However, the point is not even whether this will happen or not, but in the very impact on the psyche.

Often, direct threats should be considered as an indicator that they want to negotiate with you, and for a manipulator you are a fairly serious opponent. But even here it must be remembered that if a person were capable of some kind of decisive action, he would not threaten, but immediately began to act. So a good way to behave in the presence of a direct threat is to follow the initially chosen plan. (Here we recall that we are talking about communication situations that do not concern such things as a threat to health or life. In these cases, you need to use other methods, including methods).

These are the most common methods of psychological pressure. As you noticed, describing them, we also indicated the simplest ways to deal with them. But not always and not all people can always be calm, control the course of communication and analyze what is happening. Often emotions take over, and then you have to forget about composure. It is precisely at such moments that it is necessary to apply methods of protection against psychological aggression.

Below we will introduce you to several such methods, so after reading the article, your defensive arsenal will be replenished with new types of “weapons”. However, before moving on to these methods, watch a short video.

5 Simple Tricks to Protect Against Psychological Pressure

The described techniques are very simple to use, and anyone can master them. By and large, many of us unconsciously already use them, but the maximum effect can still be obtained if two conditions are met: understand that you are using a specific technique, and understand what you are using it for. At first glance, these are small things, but in reality they are of great importance.

So, here are these five simple tricks:

  1. To reduce psychological pressure in the process of communication, place objects between you and the interlocutor. These can be chairs, a table, some interior elements. Even small things, such as putting an ashtray on the table or holding a cup of coffee to your mouth, can reduce your susceptibility to the psychological onslaught of the interlocutor.
  2. If you notice that someone is exerting psychological pressure, take it. Crossing your legs, crossing your arms, lowering your head and looking down from under your brows, you protect your vital organs and energy points. Such poses are not just called closed, because they really close a person for the perception of other people's signals.
  3. In addition to real barriers between yourself and the interlocutor, you can create mental barriers. Choose what seems to you the most powerful protection: a wall of water, ice or fire, a glass jar or a cloud of gray smoke, a force field or even a spacesuit. Remember how in childhood, when playing, we said: "I'm in the house"? This is also not without reason, because thoughts have the ability to influence our perception.
  4. When someone is pushing you at home or at work, divert their attention. To do this, you can choose anything that will not allow the interlocutor to concentrate. Take a glass of water in your hands and start watering the flowers, turn on the water, open a magazine on a page with a girl in a swimsuit ... You can do something that knocks down the interlocutor: if you are a man, cough, or hit your palm with your fist; if you are a woman, effectively cross your legs or bend down beautifully behind an allegedly fallen hairpin, etc. To reduce the strength of the psychological impact of a partner, any distraction is effective. The main thing is that it looks natural, and also does not repeat too often.
  5. If you have, defense against psychological attack can be turned into a fun game. To do this, mentally remove the interlocutor from the image in which he currently appears. Introduce an important and pompous interlocutor as a court jester; a scarecrow stuffed with hay; a naked baby doll that jumped out of the bath; clumsy penguin, etc. The most important thing is to choose an absolutely ridiculous image, thanks to which any psychological pressure will be minimized.

Agree that it will not be difficult to become skilled in these techniques? We think that you will cope with this task successfully. But do not rush to close the page and run towards the manipulators. Next, we will reveal a few more useful tricks.

Effective fight against psychological pressure: algorithm of actions

Anyone who has had to deal with psychological pressure at work, in the company of friends, relatives or not very familiar people, knows that as soon as you relax and get confused, you suddenly begin to behave like an unreasonable child. Someone immediately begins to defend himself, someone hides his head in the sand, and someone succumbs to the influence of the manipulator and does what he is told. What response to such stress will be adequate and optimal?

The very first thing you need to do (and learn how to do) is to calmly perceive the incoming flow of information, stop emotional perception and begin to study the situation. Ideally, this should be done in one step and take a meager amount of time. And things like:

  • start breathing deeply and focus on breathing;
  • start slowly counting to ten (can be done together with breathing);
  • begin to carefully consider the interlocutor (here you need to pay attention to his appearance and behavior in order to find something that characterizes him as a person).

But psychologists advise a more interesting way: start to notice how the state of your partner changes in the process of communication. For example, catch where he is looking and how his eyes run; correlate his facial expressions and gestures with the content of the words. Some people look away when you start watching them closely, others become nervous, start fingering, fiddling with the tip of their jacket or clicking a pen, etc. By such manifestations, one can more or less accurately determine the true intentions and motives of the interlocutor, as well as understand what state he is in.

So: at the moment when you manage to become a "researcher", i.e. start to study the situation, you can begin to find out exactly what kind of influence the psychological aggressor is trying to have on you. And if you make sure that a person is exerting psychological pressure, do not hesitate and start defending yourself competently and professionally using the algorithm presented below.

Step 1 - ask questions

The purpose of asking questions is to gain time to think about the situation in general and your behavior in particular. You can directly ask your interlocutor if you can disagree with him in what he says to you. If he answers you yes, you can simply point it out and give him a negative answer to his request. If you feel that there is some kind of dependence in your relationship, find out what the consequences may be if you refuse.

The main condition is to clearly see the relationship between the words and actions of the interlocutor and your reactions. It often happens that the manipulator hides his manipulations, as a result of which he does not want to be exposed, so direct questions can make him retreat. This is especially true in situations where other people are present.

In the case when the relationship between your actions and the actions of your opponent is clearly visible from the very beginning, questions will help you get some time to think about your future behavior. Clarifying questions, such as:

  • Why did you decide that I don't want to take responsibility?
  • Why do you think I'm responsible for this?
  • What exactly should I be responsible for?
  • What makes you think I'm scared?
  • What do you think I should be afraid of?
  • Do you think that I have no right to refuse? Why?
  • Are you sure what you're saying? Why?
  • Why do you think so?

The main task when asking questions will be to find out the reasons why the interlocutor is in a winning position. Once you have time, move on to the next step.

Step 2 - Determine Your Opponent's Advantage

At the second stage, you need to understand how the aggressor exerts psychological pressure, how he plans to influence you. By understanding this, you will get a chance to organize a more powerful defense. Perhaps the opponent thinks he can influence you by raising his voice or shouting. In this case, you do not need to succumb to pressure. You just have to wait until the fuse of the aggressor weakens, and after that express your point of view.

It is possible that the manipulator will try to put pressure on you with the help of third parties present nearby. If so, then there is no need to lower your head. Pay attention to other people's reactions. You can even feel free to start looking at them. The mere fact that you are non-verbally addressing those present will cause them to give you some kind of feedback. The unanimity of third parties is very rare, so one of them may take your point of view. Yes, and the banal silence of others can be used to your advantage.

Remember that you cannot be psychologically broken, so you need to object slowly and calmly. Any tricks of the aggressor can be questioned or weakened if you are careful. When, for example, the interlocutor refers to some kind of authority, you can indicate that this technique is not suitable for the current situation. And if, for example, the aggressor points to his experience or age, you need to find arguments based on your experience and age.

If you want to keep the prospect of cooperation, you do not need to discount the opponent's arguments. It is better to somehow limit their applicability, using objective considerations for this. Here a person says that you have been communicating for a long time and helped him before, and that now he is again waiting for help. Relationships should not be underestimated. It is much more effective to point out the real reasons why you cannot help at the moment.

When the aggressor uses rush communication against you (at an increased pace), you need to come up with a way to stop him. You can say that you need to urgently call, go to the bathroom, send an email, etc. Any adequate pretext will help you reduce the pressure of your opponent, take a break and, knowing what the interlocutor is counting on, putting pressure on you, find your own method of pressure.

Step 3 - Determine Your Benefits

What can you use to help yourself? There are many options: support from third parties, reference to past positive experience, own merits, functions performed, authority, etc. But it’s better not to use reciprocal pressure, especially if the relationship with the manipulator is important to you for some reason.

It is best to build your arguments so that both you and the aggressor clearly understand the connection between your judgments. And if you offer your own solution to the problem, it is more competent to make it so that it is a compromise, i.e. suited both you and your communication partner.

Remember that your responses should not be too assertive, and even if you manage to successfully parry attacks, you should not show your superiority. Your task is to balance the balance, and not aggravate the situation and provoke conflict. And after the psychological pressure on you weakens, you can show your business qualities by offering cooperation.

Step 4 - Propose a Collaboration

Negotiating with a psychological aggressor is the best way to resolve a negative situation, because in this way you, firstly, make sure that you have managed to successfully apply psychological defense techniques, and secondly, let your interlocutor understand that in the future attempts to put pressure on you won't lead to anything good.

Of course, you can “cut off the ends” and permanently end the relationship with the aggressor, but in cases with loved ones or those with whom you will be forced to communicate, this option will not work. Therefore, a focus on long-term cooperation is the best choice. The same applies to situations where, for some reason, you still have to make some concessions.

Achieving a compromise is also beneficial because you will have the opportunity to explain to your partner the incorrectness of his behavior. That is why it is recommended to refrain from accusations and even more so from threats. Having come to a mutually beneficial agreement, you will prevent psychological attacks in the future, because your partner will remember how the past situation ended. This allows you to set up psychological manipulators to build constructive relationships.

Thus, we have a clear algorithm of actions when someone exerts psychological pressure:

  1. Use questions to get extra time to think about the situation and determine the advantages of the aggressor.
  2. Determine the advantages of the aggressor, i.e. those methods of pressure that he uses or intends to use.
  3. Determine your advantages, i.e. those methods of counteraction that will be appropriate and effective in a given situation.
  4. Align the balance of power and offer cooperation, for example, to come to a solution that is beneficial for everyone.

We advise you to always adhere to the techniques proposed in the article and the algorithm for protecting against psychological pressure, because at home, at work or in the company of friends, in most cases it is necessary to maintain good relationships. At the same time, we are well aware that these methods are not suitable for every situation, so you need to master other techniques to resist manipulators.

You can get acquainted with some of them in our article "", and Igor Vagin, a candidate of medical sciences, an experienced psychotherapist, business coach and specialist in sales, negotiations and personnel management, will tell you about some in this short video.

The Labor Code of the Russian Federation gives the employee the right to initiate termination of the employment contract. This law is called "dismissal of one's own free will", which means a free, voluntary, not imposed by the employer expression of precisely the desire of the employee.

Voluntariness means the performance of actions of one's own free will, involves making a decision independently, without coercion, in conditions of freedom of choice of behavior. This excludes deceit, as well as the use of any illegal method of influence, including physical or mental (Determination of the Samara Regional Court of 06/23/2011 in case N 33-5870 / 2011).
According to the court (Appeal ruling of the Moscow City Court dated March 4, 2015 in case N 33-6848 / 2015), referring to paragraph 22 of the Decree of the Plenum of the Supreme Court of the Russian Federation dated March 17, 2004 N 2, the basis for terminating the employment contract in accordance with Art. 80 of the Labor Code of the Russian Federation is a voluntary initiative of the employee, expressed in writing and not changed before the expiration of the employer's warning about the employee's intention to terminate the employment relationship. At the same time, the law imposes on the employer the obligation to formalize the termination of the employment contract on the last day of the employee’s work, issue the employee a work book, other documents related to work, at the written request of the employee, and make the final settlement with him.
The motive for making such a cardinal decision of an employee (to quit of his own free will) may be a number of circumstances that have developed both with the participation of the employer and without him. It happens that under de jure "dismissal of one's own free will" unlawful actions (inaction) of the employer are hidden, but it is the employee who must prove this.
According to the Decree of the Plenum of the Supreme Court of the Russian Federation dated March 17, 2004 N 2 "On the application by the courts of the Russian Federation of the Labor Code of the Russian Federation" when considering disputes on the termination on the initiative of an employee of an employment contract concluded for an indefinite period, as well as a fixed-term employment contract (paragraph 3 of part 1 article 77, article 80 of the Labor Code of the Russian Federation) the courts need to keep in mind the following: termination of the employment contract at the initiative of the employee is permissible in the case when the filing of a letter of resignation was his voluntary expression of will. If the plaintiff claims that the employer forced him to file a resignation letter of his own free will, then this circumstance is subject to verification and the obligation to prove it rests with the employee.
In positive judicial practice in cases in which the employee managed to prove that the resignation letter was submitted by him under pressure, 4 main cases are distinguished:
1. The dismissal was declared illegal, because the employee wrote a letter of resignation for fear of being dismissed on a compromising basis.
Based on the materials of one case N 33-8066 / 2013 (Appeal ruling of the Supreme Court of the Republic of Tatarstan dated 07/22/2013), the employee was reinstated as a janitor. He appealed to the employer with a demand to ensure proper working conditions, to issue overalls and tools. The employer drew up an act in which he recorded the employee's refusal to go to work, and also indicated that the service life of the clothes and equipment issued to the employee before the dismissal had not expired. In this regard, the employee wrote a letter of resignation of his own free will, in which he noted that the reason for the dismissal was the impossibility of fulfilling his labor duties. The court satisfied the demands of the employee, the dismissal was recognized as unlawful. The decision of the court of first instance was upheld due to the fact that the writing by the employee of a letter of resignation of his own free will is due to the conflict situation between the parties caused by the employer's misconduct. The court noted that the application was written under compulsion under the threat of dismissal at the initiative of the employer, i.e. under pressure from him.
The dismissal was also declared unlawful in case N 33-435 / 2012 (Appeal ruling of the Supreme Court of the Republic of Kalmykia dated 10.07.2012). The employee, while on duty, felt unwell and, with the permission of the foreman, left the workplace to receive medical care. The employer drew up acts on his absence from work. The employee wrote a letter of resignation of his own free will. The court pointed out that there was no voluntary expression of the will of the employee to terminate the employment contract on his own initiative. The writing of the letter of resignation was due to the prevailing circumstances (the actions of the employer, who forced the employee to resign at his own request, the employee's illness). Drawing up acts on the absence of an employee at the workplace without clarifying the reasons for the absence is regarded as a way of putting pressure on the employee in order to compel him to resign at his own request.
2. The dismissal was declared illegal, since the application for dismissal was filed by the employee in connection with the employer's refusal to grant study leave.
An example is the Determination of the Moscow City Court of 07/08/2010 in case N 33-20388. The employee, in accordance with the established procedure, received a call from an educational institution to undergo an intermediate certification. He turned to the employer with a request to provide additional leave with pay to participate in the certification, which was refused. Subsequently, the employee wrote an application for granting him another paid leave, however, the employer refused him this too. Because of this, the employee wrote a letter of resignation of his own free will. The court found the dismissal unlawful, since, according to Art. 173 of the Labor Code of the Russian Federation, the employer is obliged to provide the employee with additional leave with pay for passing the intermediate certification. This requirement of the law was violated by the employer. It turns out that the employee filed an application for resignation of his own free will, under the influence of circumstances created by the employer.
3. The dismissal was declared illegal, since the application submitted by the employee did not contain an indication of dismissal of his own free will.
In case N 33-16512, the decision of the court of first instance was canceled and a new decision was issued (Determination of the Moscow Regional Court of 26.08.2010). Taking into account the actual circumstances of the case: the removal of the employee from work, her exclusion from the territory of the enterprise for the duration of the internal investigation, the sending of an application for leave with subsequent dismissal, in which the grounds for dismissal were not indicated, by mail, the court concluded that the will of the employee to dismiss of her own free will is not expressed in the application, therefore, the dismissal of an employee of her own free will is recognized as illegal and unreasonable.
4. The dismissal was declared illegal, since the employee proved that the application for dismissal was submitted by him under the psychological pressure of the employer.
An illustration of this case is the Appellate ruling of the Astrakhan Regional Court dated May 30, 2012 in case No. 33-1592/2012.
The plot of the case: disciplinary sanctions were imposed on the employee three times (including during the period of being on regular leave), which were subsequently canceled as illegal and unreasonable. The employee wrote a letter of resignation of her own free will.
The conclusion of the court is as follows: the dismissal is unlawful. The employee was subjected to psychological pressure from the employer, which is confirmed by the evidence presented. The psychological state of the employee, caused by the illegal actions of the employer in the period preceding the dismissal, did not allow her to adequately manage her actions at the time of writing the letter of resignation of her own free will. There was no voluntary expression of the will of the employee to dismiss.
A number of court decisions in favor of the employee were made on the basis that witnesses were involved who confirmed the words of the plaintiff (employee) about pressure from the employer. Thus, in case N 33-2152/2011 (Appellate ruling of the Samara Regional Court dated March 22, 2012), pressure from the employer was confirmed by the testimony of witnesses.
A good example is case N 33-340 (Determination of the Voronezh Regional Court of 01/25/2011). The employer, having learned about the employee's pregnancy, suggested that she write a letter of resignation of her own free will. The director referred to the fact that the term of the employment contract allegedly expired, and if the employee does not quit of her own free will, then she will be fired at the initiative of the administration, which will negatively affect the subsequent employment of the employee. The result of this is the writing by the employee of a letter of resignation of her own free will, after which she was dismissed by the employer. After studying all the circumstances of the case, the court ruled that the dismissal was unlawful, on the day the employee wrote the letter of resignation, she was subjected to psychological pressure from the employer. This is confirmed by oral evidence (testimonies of witnesses, explanations of the parties), as well as written evidence presented by the employee. The evidence was audio recordings of a conversation between the employee's father and the director and her husband with the chief accountant about the reasons for the employee's dismissal.
Basically, the practice on the issue considered in this article is negative (see the Appeal ruling of the Omsk Regional Court dated February 4, 2015 in case N 33-686 / 2015, the Decision of the Soviet District Court of Bryansk dated July 10, 2015 in case N 2-2795 /2015), due to the fact that if the plaintiff claims that the employer forced him to file a letter of resignation of his own free will, then this circumstance is subject to verification and the obligation to prove it rests with the employee, which is very difficult.
Employers put pressure on employees in various ways to persuade them to write a letter of resignation, allegedly of their own free will. In practice, the most common form of coercion to dismiss of one's own free will is the threat of dismissal under the article for absenteeism or other misconduct. It is essential to highlight that without reliable evidence, for example, in the form of audio recordings, this type of coercion is the least likely to be proven. However, the judges also make demands on the audio recording. Thus, the judicial board of the court of the Khanty-Mansiysk Autonomous Okrug - Ugra (Appeal ruling in case N 33-3298 / 2015) considered the conclusion of the lower court correct, since it is impossible to identify the persons participating in the conversation from the audio recording submitted by the plaintiff, to determine under what conditions the audio recording was made, as well as the date and time of the conversation on the recording.
The Decision of the Taganrog city court of the Rostov region dated November 13, 2014 in case No. 2-8105-14 seems to be indicative. Checking the plaintiff's arguments that the employment contract was terminated due to forced circumstances in the absence of a legal basis, the court, having evaluated the evidence presented in their totality, came to the conclusion that the fact of pressure exerted by the employer on the plaintiff, forcing her to write a letter of resignation voluntarily, since it was established that the basis for the dismissal was the statement of the plaintiff from<дата>, in which she asked to be dismissed of her own free will from a specific calendar date.
Employer verification:
- observance of labor discipline;
- proper performance of the duties assigned to the employee;
- the implementation of the exclusive right of the employer to bring persons who committed a disciplinary offense to responsibility cannot be regarded as coercion to dismiss of their own free will. Based on this, the Appeal ruling of the Altai Regional Court dated February 11, 2015 in case No. 33-1142-15 upheld the decision of the lower court, and the plaintiff's complaint was not satisfied. The main conclusion of the judicial body: the mere presence of reports from hospital staff and patients cannot serve as a sufficient and unconditional basis for recognizing the fact that the plaintiff was pressured by the employer, and his dismissal is illegal.
The courts in case N 33-2531 / 2015 (Appeal ruling of the Ulyanovsk Regional Court dated June 23, 2015) did not find any grounds for recognizing illegal dismissal of their own free will, since there is no evidence in the case file indicating that the defendant exerted pressure on the plaintiff when filing a letter of resignation.The appeal also did not contain evidence regarding the circumstances confirming the fact of psychological influence on the plaintiff in order to dismiss him of his own free will. the termination of the employment contract in itself cannot be evidence of pressure exerted on the employee by the employer.The plaintiff's allegations that the employer put pressure on him, threatening him with dismissal due to the presence of claims to his work, cannot lead to the cancellation of the decision, since it does not indicate a compulsion to dismiss of one's own free will, since the choice of the basis for dismissal in this case lies with the employee.

conclusions

1. When considering disputes on termination at the initiative of an employee of an employment contract concluded for an indefinite period, as well as a fixed-term employment contract, the following must be borne in mind: termination of an employment contract at the initiative of an employee is permissible in the case when filing a letter of resignation was his voluntary expression of will. If the plaintiff claims that the employer forced him to file a resignation letter of his own free will, then this circumstance is subject to verification and the obligation to prove it rests with the employee. This circumstance testifies to the large scale of negative judicial practice (refusal to satisfy the claims of employees who allegedly quit of their own free will), because it is difficult to prove coercion (pressure from the employer) to dismiss of one's own free will.
2. Lack of evidence leads to refusal to satisfy the claim:
- testifying to the pressure exerted by the defendant on the plaintiff when applying for dismissal;
- regarding the circumstances confirming the fact of psychological influence on the plaintiff with the aim of his dismissal of his own free will.
3. The plaintiff's allegations that the employer put pressure on him, threatening him with dismissal due to the existence of claims against his work, cannot lead to the cancellation of the decision, since it does not indicate a compulsion to dismiss of his own free will.
4. If the writing of a letter of resignation by an employee of his own free will was due to a conflict situation between the parties caused by the unlawful behavior of the employer, then this may serve as a basis for recognizing the dismissal as illegal.
5. If the will of the employee to dismiss of his own free will is not expressed in the application, the dismissal may be recognized as illegal and unreasonable.
6. Dismissal is recognized as illegal if the employee proves that the application for dismissal was submitted by him under the psychological pressure of the employer. In this category of cases, the main evidence is: testimony of witnesses, explanations of the parties, audio recordings.